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In Refinery29’s Sweet Digs, we take a look inside the sometimes small, sometimes spacious homes of millennial women. Today, 33-year-old Christine shows off her £38k renovation in Brooklyn.

When Christine Han, now 33, and her husband Ben moved into their three-bedroom apartment, they were in the midst of a major renovation and Christine was in her first trimester. Now, they live in a two-bedroom home with a huge common area and two bathrooms, along with their baby boy Kai and their dog Epic.

Christine took lead on the renovation. She works as an experiential event designer, so she drew up the floor plans and made the renderings herself. They tore down a wall and merged the third room with the living and dining rooms to get a huge common space. “We had to relocate the sprinklers,” Christine explained. They moved the doorway to Kai’s bedroom to face the main hall and the added a bookcase to the master room.

The master bedroom’s ensuite bathroom looks like it belongs in a fancy hotel, but Christine’s favorite part of the room is the gallery wall: “It has all the photos from our trip that I took. Some of the photos of us were taken by the local photographers that we hire when we travel.” While hiring a local photographer for traveling seems luxurious, Christine adds, ” It’s a really great way to meet the locals, but also see the local spots.” In the end, the renovation cost £38k, which includes the contractor, architect, sprinkler engineer, and additional items they used to turn their space into a home.

Read more about the renovation process from Christine herself, below.

How did you find this apartment?
We actually had a real estate agent who fell through. He was terrible. He kept showing me stuff that was on Streeteasy that I’ve already seen like two days before. So we were like, okay we’re going to keep him, but we’re also going to look on our own. Nine months in, one day this one just popped up on Streeteasy and we lived across the street so we stopped by. And we knew this was it.

What was it like before the renovation?
The apartment was in a really good condition. It had an awesome kitchen and bathrooms. It had three bedrooms and two bathrooms. We were looking for a true two-bedroom apartment with a large living room in Dumbo, it was very hard to find exactly that. So when we found this apartment, we removed the third bedroom to make our common space larger.

How long did this renovation take and how much did it cost?
It took about three months and it cost around £38,000. £25,000 includes hiring a contractor, an architect and a sprinkler engineer and materials. Approximately £13,000 was spent for furnishing and decorating.

What was a must-have when moving into this apartment?
Large common space, because we like to host people. We also spend the most time in the kitchen and the living room. We also wanted true two bedrooms since we knew we wanted to have a baby in the near future.  We wanted nice bathrooms and a kitchen so we can reduce the cost of the renovation.

What was the hardest part of the renovation process?
Besides getting a building permit, it’s keeping everything within budget. Also making sure things look good and are functional.

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Jessica Barden can’t attribute her faith in The End Of The F***ing World to more than just a “feeling.” That feeling, combined with the lack of leading roles for women in the industry, carried her through half a decade of waiting as the 2011 comic by Charles S. Forsman went from a 2014 TV short to a 2017 Netflix series. Now solidly a cult favourite, a much-clamoured for season 2 arrives on Channel 4 on November 4th.

Barden’s dedication to the series, and her character Alyssa, has only grown since she first embodied the high schooler when she herself was 19 years old. Now 27, Barden still credits a majority of the show’s genius to the series’ writer, Charlie Covell. But it’s Barden who, alongside Alex Lawther’s James, has spent the majority of her career bringing one of the most complicated and honest young characters to life — which is almost as long as fans feel like they’ve been waiting for the show’s season 2 return after that intense season 1 cliffhanger.

When I sit down with Barden at the Bowery Hotel in New York City in September, I’m still waiting. At the time, I was one of the few people who knew of the season’s return date, and that’s about it. No plot, no photos, and no teasers of what’s to come. Like anyone who watched the show would, I immediately ask Barden what happened to Alyssa’s partner-in-crime, James. We last saw him running away from the police on a deserted beach, a cut-to-black season-ending accompanied by the echoing cry of a potentially fatal gunshot. In full Alyssa fashion, Barden immediately questions why he’s getting all the attention.

“No one ever asks if Alyssa is coming back,” she says. “I could be dead. I could literally just be in one episode. It’s always all about James, always about Alex, all the time.”

Having now seen the second season, I understand the playful frustration: This is Alyssa’s story now. Season 1 heavily focused on the dynamic between these two lonely misfits, but season 2 isn’t a love story — it’s a survival one. The show picks up two years after the events of the first season, and a lot has changed. We’ve all clocked the wedding dress in the posters and the teaser trailer, but knowing our British Bonnie and Clyde, there’s a lot more to the story. All Barden will say is that Alyssa channels her feelings from the events of season 1 into something “really relatable,” something familiar to anyone who remembers being young and needing validation, and finding it in the wrong place. 

“You see her make a really big mistake,” Barden teases. “You see her in the most Alyssa way possible.”

That’s what Barden says Alyssa represents to her: rebellion, but also choice. She tells me she took another leaf out of the character’s book when it came to a potential period sex scene back in season 1 that she ultimately chose not to do. In fact, there were supposed to be a number of “gnarly sex scenes” that Barden and Lawther axed ahead of filming the first round of the series. 

“It didn’t really feel right for the show,” Barden says. “There are so many other shows where you can watch kids having really great sex.”

She’s likely referring to popular teen shows like Riverdale and Euphoria. While the sex in the latter wouldn’t be described as “really great” — it’s often downright problematic — it does put teen sexuality front and centre in honest, gritty detail. That being said, Euphoria and TEOTFW, despite their disparate quantities of glitter, aren’t on totally separate wavelengths. The popularity of the two illustrates teen viewers’ desire to see more content exploring mental health, something that Barden actively thinks about when choosing her roles. 

“The scripts that I’ll be signed on to have always been the same because I choose things which I relate to,” she explained. “That’s how I choose work. They all have themes of mental health.” 

In TEOTFW, both characters are very frank about feeling “different” from everyone else — parents, peers, convenience store workers, good ol’ Marvin at the diner, you name it. For Alyssa specifically, everything changes in season 1 after she becomes the survivor of an attempted rape. James ends up killing the rapist, changing the trajectory of the show from the story of high school runaways seeking adventure to teens at the centre of a nationwide manhunt. The trauma of the attempt follows her throughout the season, and it’s even more present in season 2.

The arrival of newcomer Niaomi Ackie (in a breakout role) puts another wrench into things. Ackie, who next appears as Jannah in Star Wars: The Rise Of Skywalker, plays Bonnie, a new character on her own tragic journey. 

“It’s the most perfect, incredible female relationship ever,” Barden says. “[Bonnie]’s intertwined with a character that you saw in the first series in a truly fucked-up way.”

But just as notably, Ackie is the first woman Barden gets to properly spar with in the show, an experience that is rarer than you’d think for an emerging actress. 

“Everybody thinks that because of all the stuff that happened last year there’s loads of opportunities for actresses now,” she says, referring to the #MeToo and Time’s Up movements. “There’s not really, because not a lot has changed.”

That’s not specifically why Barden only worked with women directors on new projects this year. She doesn’t think you should choose work based on gender, but she does choose based on quality, and it just so happened that all the good scripts that came her way were from women. 

Two of these women-led projects, Holler by Nicole Riegal starring Pamela Adlon (“Pam has changed by life”) and Pink Skies Ahead by Kelly Oxford (“We feel like the same person”), are the hands turning the page to Barden’s next chapter. 

The former is about scrap metal — it’s not a glitzy project, but “the type of movie that people like should actually really watch.” The latter is based on the essay “No Real Danger” from Oxford’s book When You Find Out The World Is Against You.

As for the TEOTFW, after watching the final moments of the second season I’d be happy if things ended there. If this is Alyssa’s swan song, ushering Barden into a room of future Adlons and Oxfords, then that’s really not the end of the — well, you know.

The End of the F***ing World season 2 starts on Monday November 4th at 10pm and will be available on Netflix at a later date.

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Ever since my first job at MTV working as a music programmer, I can’t stop trying to match people with music they might like. So, I wrote a book called Record Collecting for Girls and started interviewing musicians. The Music Concierge is a column where I share music I’m listening to that you might enjoy, with a little context. Get everything I’ve recommended this year on Spotify, follow me on Twitter or Facebook, and leave a comment below telling me what you’re listening to this week.

Torres “Good Scare”

Torres (aka Mackenzie Scott) is back with the first single off her next album, Silver Tongue, named after the type of person who talk so good they’ll make your brain fall out. The lyrics of this song reveal Torres is one of those people. Her lyrical game has always been a huge part of what drew me to her music, but she’s kicking it up a notch here — which makes me anxious to hear more. “Good Scare” paints a vibrant picture of falling in love, one so intense that it is almost scary. This is not, however, a cuffing season anthem. It’s so much more.

Maeta “Babygirl”

Take some words of wisdom from this 19-year-old singer from L.A.: “Babygirl deserves this.” If you’ve been burning your candle at both ends, put this track on repeat and draw yourself a bath while it plays. Then read your horoscope while you add some flower petals and oil to that bath and listen again. Honest to god, a song hasn’t soothed my nerves as much as this one in a WHILE. I needed it.

Syd Silvair “Obsidian”

Are you ready to have a spell cast on you? Silvair is doing some casting and her obsidian (a dark piece of volcanic rock) might show your future as murky. There’s something so throwback about this track, from the beat that just reeks of late ’70s pop music to Silvair’s vocals, which ring clear as a bell and just weren’t made for these times.

LP Giobbi feat. TT The Artist “Jungle Queen”

Jungle, electronic’s U.K. baby from the dub scene, has to be due for a comeback, right? DJ and producer LP Giobbi brings the darkness of Jungle to life with her latest single, with vocals from TT the Artist that are designed to get you and all your friends on the floor. Speed it up, this beat never slows down.

Ambar Lucid “Questioning My Mind”

How I love a lament that questions one’s sanity set to a disco beat. This track is slowed down enough that the vibe is not manic on the dance floor, more swaying slowly as mascara runs down your face. It makes me feel like I’m at the end of a dreamy night in Milan and unexpectedly alone: fancy but sad.

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Instagram’s favourite millennial-centric brand Glossier has been amping up its makeup offerings in the last few months. Sure everyone loves the Haloscope highlighter and Boy Brow, but we’ve seen shade range expansions and innovative eyebrow pens join the minimalist lineup recently. Then, there was the launch of Glossier Play, a full line of colour cosmetics for “dialled up beauty” that added bold coloured pencils and sparkly glitter gel to the Glossier brand.

So, when the brand let us in on its newest launch, Glossier’s first liquid eyeliner, we thought that it was the perfect bridge between the clean-faced Glossier girl and the playful makeup that any Euphoria fan would appreciate. A happy medium, one could say.

Pro Tip is the sister product to Brow Flick, a sheer liquid brow liner. While the tip and packaging look almost identical, you can distinguish the difference between the two as soon as you begin to draw. Unlike Brow Flick, the new eyeliner provides a true black pigment. And while Glossier Play’s colourful eye pencils impart a diffused line that’s easily blendable, this liquid formula offers sharp application and seamless pigment with the help of an internal ball shaker.

The no-frills product has a thin brush tip made of ultra-fine fibres, which allows for ultimate flexibility. With just one glide, you get a pigmented line that doesn’t tug or pull. For those who just suck at applying liner (like me), you will likely find that this is easy to get right on the first try — something I discovered after testing Pro Tip at my desk using a tiny tabletop mirror under possibly the worst lighting situation. There was no need to take out the Q-tips for correction. The best part is how the pointed tip hugs the lash line, making the application basically foolproof (even for someone who’s too afraid to apply eyeliner on a regular basis).

With a promise of 12-hour wear, I couldn’t resist putting the eyeliner to the smudge test after a few hours by literally smudging it with my finger, and it did not move. While I might not be sweating from humid weather anymore, I trust this formula to last through all my holiday parties and any teary eyes that might come from cold winds in New York City.

The Pro Tip can be purchased alone, but Glossier is also making it available as part of a set called the Eye Trio, which will also include the brand’s mascara and waterproof makeup remover. Whether you’re in the market for a new go-to liner now or need to snag kits for the holidays, you’ll be all set with this latest launch.

Refinery29’s selection is purely editorial and independently chosen – we only feature items we love! As part of our business model we do work with affiliates; if you directly purchase something from a link on this article, we may earn a small amount of commission. Transparency is important to us at Refinery29, if you have any questions please reach out to us.

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Lena Dunham has a history of being real about what it’s like to live with chronic pain. She’s spoken out about her history with endometriosis and subsequent hysterectomy at the age of 31, and now she’s sharing her battle with another disease: Ehlers-Danlos syndrome. 

The star and creator of Girls wrote about the condition and how it’s impacted her on Instagram, after a paparazzi snapped a photo of her walking with a cane. “I could choose to be embarrassed by these paparazzi pics — I mean, that’s probably the point of someone publishing them in the first place — but I’m really not,” she wrote on Friday. “This is what life is like when I’m struggling most with chronic illness. An Ehler[s]-Danlos syndrome flare means that I need support from more than just my friends… so thank you, sweet cane!”

She added: “For years, I resisted doing anything that would make my physical situation easier, insisting that a cane would ‘make things weird.’ But it’s so much less weird to actually be able to participate than to stay in bed all day. And yes, you’d better believe I’m wearing my nightgown. I was walking four feet to the car to go to the doctor and I wanted to be full cozy.”

View this post on Instagram

I could choose to be embarrassed by these paparazzi pics- I mean, that’s probably the point of someone publishing them in the first place- but I’m really not. I could lie and say it was an early Halloween look (Don’t you get it? I’m going as a con woman leaving a Florida Keys jail after being acquitted of murdering her husband, and now she’s trying to get disability license plates.) But the truth is just: This is what life is like when I’m struggling most with chronic illness. An Ehler-Danlos syndrome flare means that I need support from more than just my friends… so thank you, sweet cane! For years, I resisted doing anything that would make my physical situation easier, insisting that a cane would “make things weird.” But it’s so much less weird to actually be able to participate than to stay in bed all day. And yes, you’d better believe I’m wearing my nightgown. I was walking four feet to the car to go to the doctor and I wanted to be full cozy. I mean, didn’t Bieber wear hotel slippers for like five years? Yeah, so I can wear my glamour nighty for two hours. And then an hour later, I’m in a meeting look tackling the job I love. That’s the two-fold life of a woman with chronic illness; we still rock our dreams and goals and passions (and fashions) and we live many lives in one day. Tell me about your day!

A post shared by Lena Dunham (@lenadunham) on Nov 1, 2019 at 11:00am PDT

Ehlers-Danlos syndrome is a group of inherited disorders that usually affects your connective tissues, specifically your skin, joints and blood vessel walls, Mayo Clinic notes. Symptoms tend to include “overly flexible” joints that can lead to pain and dislocations. Patients tend to bruise or scar more easily than most.

Just a month ago, the musician Sia took to Twitter to share her struggles with the condition. “Hey, I’m suffering with chronic pain, a neurological disease, ehlers danlos and I just wanted to say to those of you suffering from pain, whether physical or emotional, I love you, keep going [sic],” she wrote. “Life is fucking hard. Pain is demoralizing, and you’re not alone.”

Hey, I’m suffering with chronic pain, a neurological disease, ehlers danlos and I just wanted to say to those of you suffering from pain, whether physical or emotional, I love you, keep going. Life is fucking hard. Pain is demoralizing, and you’re not alone.

— sia (@Sia) October 4, 2019

The Good Place star Jameela Jamil also has said she suffers with inflammation because of the condition. 

Hey. I was diagnosed with EDS 24 years ago and have a LOT of information… if you ever need any advice. Together we can raise a shit-tonne of awareness.

— Jameela Jamil 🌈 (@jameelajamil) October 7, 2019

In March, Dunham opened up about her Ehlers-Danlos in an essay for The New York Times. “A specialist told me I had been living with Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, of the hypermobile variety, a genetic disorder that can lead to widespread physical pain,” she wrote.

Despite the seriousness of Ehlers-Danlos, Dunham managed to bring some levity to her Instagram post and also add that her condition isn’t stopping her from achieving her goals.

“I can wear my glamour nighty for two hours,” she wrote. “And then an hour later, I’m in a meeting look tackling the job I love. That’s the two-fold life of a woman with chronic illness; we still rock our dreams and goals and passions (and fashions) and we live many lives in one day.”

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In April, we featured a Money Diary from a woman dealing with incurable cancer.

Since then, she’s written for us about her relationship, and about how her diagnosis affected her working life. Here, she shares how she’s learned to live a life where nothing is set in stone.

I thought I knew how my life was going to turn out. I didn’t have a life plan but I did have expansive, well-furnished daydreams that saw me from university to a happy retirement. Then in 2018 I was diagnosed with incurable cancer. My future disappeared. I’ll be lucky to see 35, let alone 65. Growing old is a privilege that I won’t have. Will my death be painful? Will it be soon? No one knows. When I tell someone about my diagnosis, they often respond that they could get hit by a bus tomorrow. I’d love to ban this expression. It’s meant as a reminder that we’re all mortal (so hey, stop worrying!) but once you’ve been told that your life is limited, you can’t forget. You’re in the middle of the road and the bus is speeding towards you. There’s no escape. 

I don’t remember what it’s like to live without uncertainty. At first I struggled to see a future beyond the end of each week. Treatment had unpredictable side effects and I couldn’t bear to make plans that I might have to cancel. I stopped buying gig tickets after I was taken into hospital suddenly and nearly missed a show that I’d been excited about for months. When I did make plans, I made them in a flurry: I’m having a good day, let’s go out for shopping and dinner and drinks! There was a rush to live life while I was still well enough. On bad days, I’d stay at home and scroll endlessly, questioning the point of it all. Why was I browsing online for new coats when I might not make it through another winter? Every emotion was extreme, and it did me no good.                   

It took a long time to stop living week to week. It sounds trite, but life goes on – and it dragged me along with it. I had to have plans for the future because my family and friends were planning their futures, and they wanted me with them. I was signed up for family holidays, weddings and godparent duties, even though I worried that looking forward might somehow tempt fate – or that my untimely death would cause huge inconvenience to those I love. One of my friends told me that she was pregnant shortly after my diagnosis and I made a silent plea that I would live to meet her baby. Earlier this year I fought back tears on the Tube as I made my way to her house for the big introduction.

My horizon has expanded a little more with each passing month. Since spring I have been a participant in a clinical trial and these daily tablets have worked miracles on my tumours. At the moment the cancer is under control but that could change at any time. I currently have MRI and CT scans every three months to monitor my health, and I live to this rhythm. Anxiety kicks in as soon as I receive the appointment letter. I cycle through all the possible scan outcomes in my head and inevitably settle on the worst-case scenario. Over the last couple of years I’ve become more accustomed to bad news than good – and at each scan I convince myself that my luck has run out. I don’t avoid these fears, but I quieten them by looking at the past: I’ve overcome so many problems that seemed impossible at first, so why do I need to worry about the future right now? I’ll see it when it gets here. As soon as I have the results – good or bad – I feel certain enough to plan the next three months of my life.  

I cope with uncertainty by allowing myself limited time to worry about things that I can’t control. Instead, I focus my energy on what I can do to make a difference. I take care of my body through diet and exercise, and I have made many lifestyle changes as part of an ongoing effort to live more sustainably. I routinely freak out about Brexit – particularly because the drugs keeping me alive right now are imported – but I’ve accepted that my fears won’t change anything. Uncertainty has given me the clarity I needed to focus on making the best of my limited life. I worry less about how I am perceived by others. Everyday mishaps – missed trains, spilled coffee, delayed appointments – don’t faze me anymore. If an exciting opportunity comes my way, I grab it with both hands. I have just been invited to speak at a conference next autumn. I didn’t expect to see 2020 and I am still not comfortable making plans for myself one year in advance. I survived this year, though, and perhaps I’ll survive another. So I said yes. 

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The other day I came across a tweet that gave me pause for thought. It read: “I feel like I’ve had many conversations recently where I’ve come away knowing a lot about the other person but they’ve learned nothing about me.”

This tweet struck me. As a naturally quieter person, it’s a situation I’ve found myself in hundreds of times. But what I found interesting about this particular tweet was the ‘recently’ part. The number of likes and replies it had garnered made it clear that others felt the same. And it got me thinking; the internet is unmistakably the biggest ‘recent’ disrupter of our lives, so what impact has it had on our IRL conversations? As social media encourages us to promote our ‘personal brand’ (the worst phrase to enter modern culture), has it made us more prone to talking about ourselves? 

In 1974, a guy called Harvey Sacks came up with a model for conversation analysis. Each ‘turn’ in a conversation is a ‘unit’. A unit can be made up of a word, phrase or sentence. When one unit is completed, the speaker can choose to add another unit or the responsibility will fall to the other participant to add a unit of their own. But who gets to add the most units to a conversation? Sacks put the answer to this question down to ‘hierarchical reasons’ which feels like an incredibly flippant way to describe a construct I’ve spent my whole life trying to decipher.

The social media argument is worth thinking about, though. Chances are, before some well-meaning friend convinced you to sign up for Myspace, or Bebo, or even Facebook, the only platform you’d had to express yourself to an audience of any size was doing a presentation in class or performing in the school play. In short, pre-2005-ish, you’d had no experience conveying yourself to a large group of people. 

Now, due to social media, you’re able to reach thousands of people every day. Combine all your social media platforms and there’s theoretically no limit to the size of your audience. This audience and their positive reactions (there is, of course, no dislike button so unless people take the time to comment, interactions are positive) reinforce that what you’re posting about must be interesting and, as social media is often a depiction of the self, that interesting thing is you. Is it too much of a reach to suggest that this could lead a person to the subconscious conclusion that talking about themselves more is a welcome addition to a conversation?

There’s not a huge amount of research into this (in school years, Instagram just started Year Four, which doesn’t leave a lot of time for retrospection) but one study from 2018 – a joint effort between Swansea University and the University of Milan – makes for an interesting read. It investigated the links between problematic internet usage (PIU) and a rise in narcissistic traits.

The study took 74 students with an average age of 23 and monitored their behaviour over four months. It found that those who used social media excessively through visual postings “displayed an average 25% increase in such narcissistic traits … as grandiose exhibitionism, beliefs relating to entitlement, and exploiting others.”  

Professor Phil Reed, one of the authors of the study, elaborated for me. He warned that I should be careful about making casual links between social media and people talking more about themselves but that essentially: “If you post a lot of selfies, then you run the risk of developing some narcissism traits later.” These traits, he says, can range from a mild form of self-obsession (this will be only “vaguely irritating to others” and was probably what the original tweeter was on the business end of) to “grandiose views of self-importance … and a need to dominate others.”

The study focused on visual interactions on social media so can’t be used to comment on text-based social media but Anne-Sophie Bammens, a psychologist and the founder and director of Headstrong Counselling agrees that social media has encouraged sharing about oneself. “[It] has provided people with new tools to observe and be observed within a platform where sharing is a central component of participation, creating a widespread flow of personal information,” she tells me. 

She continues: “[This] certain type of interconnectivity … will inevitably have an impact on our in-person relationships.”

However, talking about oneself doesn’t need to be narcissistic. The fight against mental health problems can be helped immeasurably by opening up about our feelings to others, provided it’s under the right circumstances.

“The first step towards better mental health is to have one’s mental health challenges validated,” Bammens says. This helps us understand that it’s part of the human condition. 

Bammens warns of a thing on social media called ‘impression management’, which is the presentation of the self in a way that will lead others to form a positive image of you. “Individuals present a ‘front’ where the backstage becomes hidden. The backstage includes those experiences and feelings that are unpleasant and may be more difficult to talk about within a social sphere.” If you notice yourself engaging in this behaviour, it may mean that you’re preventing yourself from sharing personal information in an authentic and useful manner.

Social media, it seems, could be a double-edged sword. On one hand, it may be contributing to creating a group of mildly self-focused individuals who like nothing better than talking about themselves; on the other, it may hold the solution to a growing mental health problem.

“Finding the right communities on social media, who will validate our experiences,” Bammens says, can become “an important part of the healing process when we are facing mental health challenges.”

For those just starting to get comfortable talking more about themselves, Bammens recommends taking it slow. “If speaking about feelings in conversation does not come naturally, it may be worth it to ‘test the waters’. By taking small steps towards sharing your story, you’ll be able to gauge what the responses will be from your peers when it comes to the really big stuff, and decide whether or not to move forward.”

Headstrong Counselling is available at Re:Centre in Hammersmith on Monday-Thursdays from 6-9pm from £15 per session. More times and locations available here.

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I can confidently assume (based on my own arduous lifestyle) that there are only two occasions when those of us who are financially insecure and generally rubbish with money will look willingly at our bank statements. 1) On payday, to check we have indeed been paid as promised. 2) At the highest point of pre-payday desperation, to check where all our money has gone and whether the bank has added it up wrong.

On occasion number two, we like to look painfully closely at the numbers. Rent? I guess that’s expected. Phone bill? Really need to find a better contract. Tesco? Girl’s gotta eat. Topshop? Those boots were an investment. £7.99? Didn’t I end that free trial? £7.99? Shit, I didn’t end that free trial.

Those subscription services will get you like that. You’re years deep into your relationship with Netflix but didn’t realise quite how long you’d also been hanging out with Now TV. Even Amazon Prime, the one you hoped would fulfil multiple needs at once, still takes that penny shy of a round £8 even though it’s been months since you spent a really good night together.

You’d love to break it off with at least one of them, but you know you can’t. It’s disorienting, going from one to the other and, frankly, you can’t afford it. But you’re also used to getting what you want, when you want it, and so you like to have options at your fingertips. Our heads have all been turned by the promise of shiny new Apple TV+ and hey, sure, Disney+ looks like some good old-fashioned fun.  

The internet is swarming with places to get our entertainment kicks. The fact that there are so many film and TV subscription services says a lot about where we’re at as a culture right now (consume more, hope something good sticks, repeat the process and pray no one notices how tired and unfulfilling it becomes). But what does where we choose to binge watch and frustratedly scroll through ‘similar titles’ say about us? Could there be any correlation between where we stream and what we’re like as people? We’ve decided yes (although, probably not). Here’s what can be deduced about you based on where your £Something.99 is going each month.

Netflix

You’re a real people pleaser and you’re not mad about it. Sure, you tend to follow the crowd in quite a big way – not out of want but rather an innate obligation – but you’ve been pretty pleased by where it’s gotten you so far. You’ve got a judgmental streak in you, though, and enjoy mocking the friend you invited over for a hangover TV day for watching so many episodes of shit hangover TV, even though you’re the one who encouraged her to waste her day on your sofa in the first place. But your friend doesn’t mind. Deep down you know something’s going to have to give eventually. You should probably be a bit nicer, a bit easier to read. But you’re loyal and know that counts for more than people realise.

Thirty-day free trial, then from £5.99 per month

Apple TV+

Trendy with supposedly ‘nerdy’ interests in actually interesting subjects. You love shiny new things and get bored easily. You know that the thrill of having the hot new thing will only last until the next hot new thing comes along but, boy, what a rush those first few months/weeks/hours are. One of your favourite things in the world is peeling off the protective plastic seal from new electronics and you have fallen out with a friend or family member who has robbed you of the opportunity. You pretend to like drinking scalding tea out of handle-less glass mugs.

Seven-day free trial, then £4.99 per month

Amazon Prime Video

You like convenience and are always hopeful for the best in any and all situations. Sure, there have been times when you should have learned from the mistaken assumptions you’ve made about people, programmes and delivery dates, but when your gut is right about something it’s very rewarding. You might find yourself in committed relationships when all you were looking for was to take advantage of a few weeks of freedom, but the end result is fulfilling in the most unexpected ways.

Thirty-day free trial, then £7.99 per month

Britbox

As nostalgic as you are, you don’t miss things like Blockbuster Video at all. The only time you used the VCR as a kid was whenever your mum asked you to record that night’s episode of Coronation Street over your baby video/dance recital/last week’s Coronation Street, and there’s a strange yearning in your heart for choppily edited soap opera-style telly intermittently interrupted by animal documentaries and glossy period dramas with a surprise A-list name attached to them.

Thirty-day free trial, then £5.99 per month

Mubi

You once went on a date with someone who you were wildly attracted to and happened to be super into films that you’d never heard of. They looked down their nose at you when you half-jokingly brought up the fact that Netflix is releasing a sequel to A Christmas Prince and so subscribed to Mubi to try and better educate yourself in the world of cool-person cinema. You used it once and never saw that pretentious fun sponge again.

Seven-day free trial, then £9.99

Sky TV

Your parents pay for nice things and you enjoy receiving them almost as much as your housemates do. The coffee machine, the new sofa, the runner for your barren corridor – all welcome (and expected) gifts. OR your parents happen to have Sky and you wisely stole their log-in details to watch Game Of Thrones a few years ago and they never noticed.

Packages from £25 per month

Now TV

Your parents found out about you using their Sky subscription and cut you off. So then you had to do the seven-day free trial on Now TV to continue watching Game Of Thrones. You were prepared to cancel because that £7.99 could be spent on one and a half pints on a Thursday night after work but then people started getting excited about Succession and you’ve had to keep paying for it. You’re really quite annoyed about the whole thing but won’t be doing anything about it any time soon because you’re actually very excited about revisiting Sharp Objects.

Seven-day free trial, then from £8.99 per month

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It’s 8pm on a Monday and my arms are aching as I’ve spent the better part of the last three days fashioning my hair into Marley twists: a protective braiding hairstyle that weaves extensions into my own curls. Most black women I know can attest to how tiring it can be to braid a whole head of hair, as it often takes gymnastic manoeuvres to achieve certain styles. While the process is often exhausting, it is also rewarding and so worthwhile.

You might wonder why this seemingly unremarkable act is so significant to me, but hair is political and impactful for various reasons. For one, it’s a common experience for black women and girls to be subjected to negative societal standards for afro hair. In the US, cities and states such as New York and California have taken positive action to ban racial discrimination against people wearing certain natural hairstyles, but the remaining prejudice often results in dissatisfaction with natural hair in its varying textures.

The way I saw my own hair was significantly impacted by negative societal perceptions of black women and their appearance. As a young girl, it was uncommon to see women on TV, in magazines and the general media with hair like mine. If they did look like me, it was rarely presented as an image of beauty to be appreciated.

Like many other black girls experiencing hair frustration, I spent most of my childhood chemically straightening my hair with relaxers. The aim was to make my hair manageable for styling, as well as for aesthetic reasons. When I went natural somewhere in my early teens, my decision was spurred on by images I saw online of black women with luscious, healthy curls and a glowing confidence in their tresses which I didn’t have. But I was left exasperated, grappling with my tighter type 4 curls after years of relaxing.

Although the natural hair movement has changed black women’s outlook in ways that are empowering, many of us are wildly unprepared for the long process of learning to manage our hair and the trial and error involved in taking care of it. For others like myself, especially those with kinkier hair types, the difficulty of detangling, sourcing products and sectioning and styling our hair can be immense. This is often why many women revert to chemically processed hair. I don’t criticise such choices; being natural is in no way a requirement for healthy hair maintenance and perming doesn’t necessarily mean you dislike your own texture. But when provided only with YouTube videos, developing the skills to style kinky afro hair can become overwhelming, often resulting in just as much frustration as we started with.

Speaking to other black women showed me that this frustration is widespread. “I thought going natural would make my hair instantly amazing, but it turned out to be really difficult,” says Renee, 22. “I didn’t know how to do important steps like detangling or sectioning and that made the first couple of years hard.” Combine this with the stress involved in finding hair products that work – not to mention the cost – and the incredible patience required to see progress, and it’s clear that going natural comes with extra challenges. Ultimately, natural hairstyling is often an intense commitment for which many of us simply don’t have the money, energy or time.

Years of ill-management and a lack of information encouraged me to see skills like braiding as achievable goals for long-term commitment to my hair. Even though I was natural, I rarely attempted the protective hairstyles worn by my favourite vloggers out of fear of failure. I started styling my hair into beautiful high buns and ponytails, laid-back chunky cornrows and bouncy twist-outs to practise working with my natural texture. Although it didn’t always come out perfectly, it was a learning curve and I began to discover more and more about my hair. Self-taught hairstylist Ene Nwafor, who offers one-to-one braiding classes as part of her brand HerLine HQ, seconds this. “I used to watch YouTube for hours to learn new skills,” she told me. “Lots of black women get their information there as it’s such a great place to start if you don’t know much.”

Still, the one style I had yet to attempt was braids. As a fairly labour-intensive and skill-dependent style, I left it to talented individuals like my mother (who could easily style my hair with dazzling skill, neatness and speed) or experienced hairstylists. Despite my initial frustration, I gave YouTube another chance, and it ended up being a saving grace. Upon completing my own braids for the very first time, the finished result signalled an empowering point in coming to learn about and, most importantly, love my natural hair.

One thing I noticed when following braiding tutorials was a shift in creator demographic, as I found myself learning from girls in their mid-teens. They were masterful in styling their own hair and it filled me with pride. At that age, I didn’t have a clue. This is an incredibly positive development in the natural hair space. The significance of learning to braid as a member of the African diaspora is not lost on me, nor is satisfaction of sharing the skill generationally. Lola, 22, who now does her own hair, agrees. “As a second-generation Nigerian, getting my hair braided by my mum was a cultural bonding experience and a signifier of my heritage,” she told me. “It’s really gratifying to know I can engage in that and pass it on to my own children.”

Although I went natural almost a decade ago, learning to braid my hair just this month felt like a triumph after years of mistakes and dedication. Even though it took many hours and the results are currently always imperfect, being able to recreate a hairstyle that is so important to me and many other black women worldwide is a brilliant feeling. There’s an intense gratification in getting to a place of knowledge that as a teen was beyond my reach. For black women, achieving styling feats like this can be crucial in creating cultural shifts, especially in regard to how we see ourselves and, ultimately, how we come to accept and love our natural hair.

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Megan Thee Stallion transitioned her Hot Girl Summer into Hot Girl Fall and now it looks like she’s gearing up to take over winter, too. On Monday, Coach unveiled its holiday campaign starring Yara Shahidi, Kate Moss, Spike Lee, his wife Tonya, and Megan Thee Stallion, marking the rapper’s first official fashion campaign.

Though this is her first commercial debut, Meg marked her industry territory in September when was photographed next to Anna Wintour during New York Fashion Week — a sure sign that her Fashion Person™ star was on the rise. Shortly after, Vogue came calling with a 24-hour profile on the Houston-based rapper. Now, you can see the rising fashion queen sitting atop a carousel horse in her new Coach ad.

The campaign is reminiscent of a spontaneous New York house party in a brownstone. “Capturing the magical mood of the season, it champions the belief of coming together for the holidays and the inclusive, authentic spirit of New York,” the press release for the campaign reads. Below, Refinery29 exclusively shares a look at Megan behind the scenes of her Coach photoshoot.

Photographed by Juergen Teller, the H-Town hottie models in joyful, unfiltered scenes that highlight the house’s spirit of playfulness and the authentic self-expression that defines New York City. She specifically models Coach’s Tabi bag, while Moss shows off house’s new Horse and Carriage collection. According to a press release, the Horse and Carriage is a symbol of Coach’s legacy of leather craft and New York heritage, and the house’s first-ever code in the 1950s. 

Coach shared an image of Meg on Instagram, captioning it “Round and round she goes. From Hot Girl Summer to Hot Girl Winter, #MeganTheeStallion—wearing the newest #TabbyBag—kicks off #WonderForAll, our 2019 holiday celebration. Who wants to go for a ride?”

We do, and it looks like the rest of the fashion industry is going to join us.

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E. Jean Carroll, the 20th woman to accuse the President of the United States of sexual assault, is suing Donald Trump. In a defamation suit filed Monday morning, the writer and advice columnist alleged that Trump lied earlier this year when he denied raping her in a Bergdorf Goodman dressing room in the mid 90s.

In Carroll’s 2019 memoir, What Do We Need Men For?, she details her encounter with Trump, who at the department store where he allegedly attacked her in the dressing room. Carroll describes the assault in chilling detail  stating that Trump “opens the overcoat, unzips his pants, and, forcing his fingers around my private area, thrusts his penis halfway — or completely, I’m not certain — inside me.”

In light of her accusations against Trump, and his abrupt dismissal of them shortly thereafter, Carroll is now seeking punitive damages from the president. Trump faces a similar lawsuit from former Apprentice contestant Summer Zervos, who alleged that he sexually harassed her in a meeting and called her a liar after she came forward.

“I am filing this lawsuit for every woman who’s been pinched, prodded, cornered, felt-up, pushed against a wall, grabbed, groped, assaulted, and has spoken up only to be shamed, demeaned, disgraced, passed over for promotion, fired, and forgotten,” she said in a statement sent to Refinery29. “While I can no longer hold Donald Trump accountable for assaulting me more than twenty years ago, I can hold him accountable for lying about it and I fully intend to do so.”

The former Saturday Night Live writer and columnist for Elle goes on to detail how Trump’s denial of their encounter defamed and attacked her character, and even ridiculed her appearance. Although Carroll has since explained her reasons for staying quiet about her assault, she feels that now is a time to take a stand, not just against her own alleged rapist, but on behalf of other survivors, too. 

“It’s for every woman who can’t speak up because she’ll lose the job she needs to support her three kids,” she said in her statement. “No person in this country should be above the law – including the President.”

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Kacey Musgraves is about to become the face of Christmas. The country singer and “I didn’t say fuckin’ yee” meme queen is bringing a holiday golden hour to Amazon Prime this November with a new Wes Anderson-inspired holiday special, The Kacey Musgraves Christmas Show.

Premiering 29th November, it is Amazon Prime’s first holiday special, and the streaming service has pulled out all the stops. Not only is it hosted by the Grammy award-winning singer who reinvented the nose ring, it’s also narrated by Schitts Creek‘s Dan Levy.

The trailer announcement doesn’t reveal any specifics, but it does tease a few names in music and TV. In this glittery wonderland — which Amazon promises will be both “whimsical” and “dazzling” in the press release for the special —  viewers will see Musgraves joined by Camila Cabello, Zooey Deschanel, Kendall Jenner, Lana Del Rey, and Troye Sivan, among others. Amazon will also release a soundtrack from the special on the same date, featuring new renditions of classics as well as brand new holiday tracks.

“I can say without a doubt that this project is unlike anything I’ve ever done before,” Musgraves promises in the release. “What started as the small seed of an idea one night over a year ago has turned into something I’m so proud of.  Some truly brilliant comedic and musical guests are featured in the show – as well as my own Grandma. My vision was to bring my old Christmas album to life visually and create a modern and fashionable, fresh take on a classic format. It’s a nostalgic, Wes Anderson-inspired reimagining of the holidays. It’s heartfelt, funny, and most of all, real. I can’t wait to finally share.”

Check out the trailer below.

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As the world waits for Harry Styles’ next album, a theory about his ex-girlfriend is taking shape. For some reason, the fans want to know if the release date of Styles’ latest LP is all about Taylor Swift. 

Styles is gearing up to release his new album, Fine Line, on 13th December, 2019. That date happens to be Swift’s 30th birthday — a pretty big milestone. Fans on Twitter, who clearly have not forgotten Haylor, lost their minds while theorising that Styles was sending a message to either them or just straight-up to Swift herself — though no one can quite decipher what the alleged message is. 

fine line on december 13th. it is a birthday gift for someone special 👀 and that someone is taylor swift haylor is real bye

— morg IS SEEING LOUIS 💜 (@sokisshimagain) November 4, 2019

bro I can’t stop thinking about how Harry cannot have forgotten Taylor’s birthday and there’s no way it’s a coincidence that he decided to drop the album on that day like what does it mean for him to release an album on the birthday of someone who was once so significant to him? pic.twitter.com/oseyvHh1xi

— hailey 🍉 FINE LINE (@sawthatwoman) November 4, 2019

thinking about how fine line is coming out on taylor swift’s birthday pic.twitter.com/B6KY6wrQM0

— 𝖘𝖆𝖇𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖆▯ (@readyfreddiiiie) November 4, 2019

My Harry Styles x Taylor Swift collab theory is growing stronger… pic.twitter.com/A9svkTkAKr

— Ben ☃️ (@TS7Track3) November 4, 2019

me when harry said fuck taylor swifts birthday fine line is out december 13. pic.twitter.com/WsuWAQ9Epj

— leila FINE LINE (@onlyangvIs) November 4, 2019

jake gyllenhaal fully forgot taylor swift’s birthday whereas harry styles released a whole ass album on taylor swift’s birthday. in this essay i will-

— emily (@ididsomethngbad) November 4, 2019

Swift and Styles have a long romantic history, though how much dating they actually did, versus how much fans talked about them dating, is up for debate. We know that in December of 2012, Swift and Styles were spotted out together in Central Park, after months of rumours that they were dating after meeting in March at the Kids’ Choice Awards. Swift was spotted wearing what appeared to be Styles’ paper airplane necklace, which she later referenced in the 1989 track “Out of the Woods.” 

Much of Swift’s 1989, which was released in October of 2014, was seemingly about Styles, most obviously the single “Style.” In the song, Swift sang of a beau’s “long hair, slicked back” and “white t-shirt,” and well as her own “red lips.” In May of 2017, Styles seemed to reference the lyrics of “Style” in his track “Two Ghosts,” singing: “Same red lips, same eyes blue/Same white shirt, couple more tattoos.” It was almost as subtle as titling the song “Swift.” 

Alas, that was years ago, and Swift’s latest album Lover seems far more focused on her new relationship with Joe Alwyn than it does revisiting loves of the past. A rep for Styles has no comment on the fan speculation about Fine Line’s release date. Refinery29 reached out to a representative for Swift for comment.

Styles may not even know Swift’s birthday, considering they dated for a short period several years ago. It’s also possible that he does know it but didn’t want it to stop him from releasing his new album just before the holiday season. (Who wouldn’t want the new Styles album in a stocking, am I right?) 

But okay, let’s bite. If fans are correct and that Styles is dropping subtle clues here, what does the clue mean? A possible Swift collaboration? A sign that, after years writing songs for one another, all is finally well between the exes? What would be the point now? 

Someone ask the traffic lights because I don’t know.

Whatever the truth is, until either party opens up about Fine Line’s release date, we’ll have to assume that 13th December is just another day for Styles, even if it’s a massive reason to celebrate for Swifties.

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A post shared by House of Sunny (@houseofsunny) on Apr 3, 2019 at 7:32am PDT

Sound the alarm! The Hackney-based cult label House of Sunny is opening the doors to its first store this week, holding a residency on London’s South Molton Street until 8th December.

The brand’s pop-up will showcase its thoroughly ’70s AW19 collection, ‘The Wonder Years’, which includes grandpa-style argyle knits, blush jumpsuits and the Penny coat, an homage to Almost Famous which, thanks in part to its versatility (it comes in three iterations: chocolate vegan leather, jacquard tapestry and pistachio vegan suede), has dominated our Instagram feed for the past few weeks.

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A post shared by House of Sunny (@houseofsunny) on Jun 17, 2019 at 3:13am PDT

Founded by Sunny Williams in 2011, House of Sunny has built a loyal fanbase over the past eight years, with everyone from Stephanie Broek and Jessie Bush to Lucy Williams and Imani repping the brand’s pastel-hued gingham and colour-block fleeces. The label prides itself on resisting the never-ending carousel of new drops, instead releasing two season collections a year, all designed in its east London studio. 

While the AW19 collection is filling our wardrobe with chocolate knits, photo-printed co-ords and fuzzy faux fur jackets, you’d be forgiven for still being hooked on the label’s SS19 drop, which included a lime green crochet bralette and Victoriana cotton and lace blouse that essentially set the agenda for our summer aesthetic. 

Bursting with serotonin-boosting colour, playful prints and touch-me textures, House of Sunny has long been our go-to for joyful garms, so we’re thrilled to be able to browse in-store. The pop-up will also host events and experiences for customers including manicures by Secret Spa and a Bambrows brow bar, plus a performance by emerging R&B singer Tertia May. Driving home its sustainability mission, House of Sunny has invited local jewellery and accessories brands (think conscious labels like Phine and Neon Hope) to share the pop-up space with them, too. 

Christmas shopping (for ourselves and our pals) just got a hell of a lot easier. 

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A post shared by House of Sunny (@houseofsunny) on Jan 10, 2019 at 12:39am PST

House of Sunny’s pop-up shop at 45 South Molton Street is open until 8th December.

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From Plenaire to Tandem, we’re spoilt for choice when it comes to new skincare brands. But lately, nothing has piqued the interest of beauty obsessives more than Amazon’s very own line, Belei.

Seeing as most of us shop numerous daily must-haves on the site already, from coffee pods to home furnishings, it makes sense to stock up on skincare in the process, which is why the online reviews are already in on Belei. Everything in the collection has been available to shoppers in the US for a while now, with the addition of products containing acne-busting ingredient 5.5% benzoyl peroxide (unfortunately only sold on prescription here). But 19 products very recently launched on the UK website and they have been received just as positively.

While the packaging is minimal, the collection consists of a host of essentials we rely on daily, including cleansers and serums, and with dermatologist-approved kaolin clay and salicylic acid making up the ingredients lists, it’s actually pretty promising.

Intrigued, I ditched my current skincare routine, which is tailored to breakouts, pigmentation and dry patches, and swapped in various buys from the Belei range. Here’s what’s really worth your money.

Belei Dark Circle Softening Eye Cream, £18, available at Amazon.

While I don’t believe any eye cream can get rid of dark circles or ‘bags’, they do work on fine lines, wrinkles and dry patches of skin. This is actually one of the most nourishing eye creams I’ve tried. Unlike other intensely moisturising formulas, it doesn’t clog pores or leave behind a greasy residue, and so provides the perfect base for concealer. A little goes a long way.

Belei Fresh Complexion Face Peel, £12, available at Amazon.

This is much gentler than other face peels I tend to use, such as The Ordinary’s AHA 30% + BHA 2% Peeling Solution, £6.30, and Goop’s Exfoliating Instant Facial, £38, but it does a good job at brightening and smoothing bumpy skin with regular use. Give it a little massage to feel the full effects of the exfoliating particles.

Belei Ultra Sensitive Purifying Face Wash, £8, available at Amazon.

While gel cleanser doesn’t lather or foam, it cuts through oil as well as makeup, grime and dead skin cells. It makes skin feel squeaky clean minus the uncomfortably taut after-effects.

Belei Gentle Cleansing Milk, £8, available at Amazon.

This reminds me of both the gentle and effective Simple Purifying Cleansing Lotion, £3.79, and Nivea’s Sensitive Cleansing Milk, £4.29. The formula is lightweight, not clogging, and removes even heavy makeup without stripping skin. Follow with a proper water-based cleanse to get rid of every single scrap of foundation and mascara.

Belei Deep Cleansing Charcoal Mask, £12, available at Amazon.

Charcoal masks often suck the life out of skin, leaving it dry and flaky, but this one is much kinder. The addition of zinc and kaolin clay clings to oil and dirt on the skin so that it doesn’t block pores and result in breakouts.

Belei Detox Day Moisturiser with SPF 15, £16, available at Amazon.

While I’m wary of the word ‘detox‘ when it comes to skincare (you can’t really ‘detox’ your skin) this is packed with emollients, making it a great moisturiser for skin prone to dryness and flaking, whether winter weather or retinol-induced. My only gripe is that the sunscreen factor should be higher, so I used a separate SPF. Try Rituals SPF Drops SPF 50, £29.90, or Ultrasun Face Lotion SPF 30, £22.

The verdict

While various products in the collection include a handful of expert-approved ingredients, I was surprised to discover that the UK line was limited compared to the US and void of popular additions like retinol and vitamin C. I contacted the brand to find out if there would be an expansion soon.

The price point for each product is higher than own-brand lines available at Boots, Superdrug and Aldi, for example, but with masks and cleansers coming in at £8-12, products are still relatively affordable. You also get a good amount of product for your money, which is a bonus.

Overall, there are a handful of products I’d continue to use. My skin can be prone to acne, so changing a lot of things at once isn’t always the best idea. The eye cream is now a staple in my routine, as is the peel (which I’ll do once or twice a week) and the cleansing milk – a product I use to take off my makeup while using retinol, as it’s much more soothing and moisturising than other makeup removers.

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